You Can Call Me Gwen

Vacation, anyone? And I do mean anyone!

See this?

 

And this?

 

 

These are scenes from Peru.

Our credit card company contacted us today to see if it was really us trying to charge plane tickets to Peru.

And we said,

"Um. No."

Nonfat Chocolate Bunnies

Today Naomi and I are going to go care for her Darling Mither, who is rather under the weather.

Since we don't have time to play, I'm just going to write down a couple of things that are swirling in my brain.

 

I'd like to make some chocolate bunnies like the ones seen here.

Yesterday I pressed these 'rescued' fabrics which I found in my stash on Saturday.

 

They're from curtain panels I bought at the thrift store.

They cost me an entire American dollar.

I think they'd make luscious bunnies.

 

----

 

My chicks are getting exponentially bigger and busier every day.

And I'm gaining a whole new appreciation for the term "henpecked".

 

----

 

I found this in the hymnal at church on Sunday:

 

 

 

"Your bothering your brother LOL."

"Wichone?"

"The ugly one lol."

"So! "I always bother him!!! LOL"

Etc.

How many of you have NEVER written a note in church?

I wrote one just a few months back and slipped it to one of those college girls of mine.

It said...

"Stop passing notes in church."

'Inner Balance' and 'Outer Banks'

I've been out with a friend today, helping her choose paint colors for several of the rooms in her home.

The possibilities are so endless, and color is so yummy, that I painted about a hundred rooms just standing in front of the paint chip displays.

I'm exhausted.

I'm too tired to actually DO anything.

Except think.

And I'm wondering who gets to name the paint colors.

And what is their source of inspiration?

When I say, 'Showtime', does a certain hue spring to mind?

How about, 'Sequin', 'Enigma', or 'Everlasting'?

'Castleton Mist', 'Sweet Daphne', and 'Midieval Times'?

They really don't tell you much, do they?

Gosh.

I'd like to name some paint colors.

And they would tell you something...even if it wasn't about color.

'Techie's Revenge'.

'I'm Telling Mom'.

'Order Out'.

 

 

Yep. That's a job I could go for.

Chickens and plumbers and fish, oh my!

It's Monday and there are just bunches of things swirling through my brain.

Ready for a ride?

 

First, I have a question.

Have any of you ever vacationed at a dude ranch?

My heart beats faster when I think about the vacation plans we started discussing this weekend with my Big Seester and her hubby.

I am considering looking for temporary work to bankroll good times in September.

Colorado, fall, horseback, mountains, and....ART!

Look at this place!

Yikes!

Be still my beating heart.

Speak to me, friends.

Ever done something like this?

 

Along another line...

Look who came to live with me this weekend:

 

 

Tammy Faye has arrived.

She and her friends are living in my laundry room in their own little home.

It has central heat.

 

 

 

I like to go in the laundry room in the morning, make a little noise, and wake the precious chickies up.

Once they start moving about, I tell them, "Now, I want to hear a peep out of you!"

(I'm sure the Shoots never thought they'd see the day I'd turn that phrase around.)

I got the chickies out for a photo shoot today.

They were pretty dadgum excited and wouldn't hold still for the camera.

 

 

 

That's Marilyn and Alice in back,  Amy and Tammy Faye in front.

They have their own personalities.

Believe you me.

 

 

 

 

See what I mean?

Amy (on the left here) just lays it on the line.

I mean, she tells you exactly how she feels about you.

How rude.

I think Marilyn (in the middle) believes she's just a little better than the rest.

But, hey, maybe she is.

I'm a little partial to Tammy Faye (on the right).

My shallow love is based on looks, however, and we all know those change as we age.

But, I gotta tell you this: It's a really good thing my love isn't based on smell or we'd be starting off where we might end up.

 

 

(Pausing here to tell you what I just overheard the plumber say. He is here to give us a quote on the new furnace and AC.  He said, "We're only ten percent negative."  I'm sure it had to do with something mechanical, but it floated to my ears out of context, and I thought, "Gee, that's pretty good. Most people these days are a lot more negative than that.")

 

Now on to other things.

I finished my little Swimmy softie.

 

 

 

 

I love Swimmy.

He's got spirit.

He was kind of up against the big guys.

(I'm thinking of making one or two of them to go with Swimmy when I drop him for the Toy Society.)

 

 

 

 

But Swimmy figured out a way to scare the big guys off.

 

 

 

It's so important to have friends.

Like you.

Thanks.

Are you trying to start something??

I haven't been able to post for a couple of days because that ol' Naomi made me help her clean out our sewing closet.

She thinks that when I'm excited about a new project, I'm careless and messy when I go in there to get fabrics and supplies.

I keep trying to explain how hard it is to be all painstakingly neat and tidy when your hair is on fire about something.

She just doesn't get it.

Anyway, we cleaned out the closet.

And now she thinks I shouldn't be allowed to start any new projects.

She says I never finish anything.

Because we found this:

 

 

It's a true scrap quilt started 20 years ago for one of the male Shoots.

She thinks I ought to finish it, since it's made from the scraps of fabric she used to make the family's clothes.

She says it would be nice to have it for the male Grandshoots to use when they visit.

We also found this: 

 

 

 

 

This is a king-size quilt top in the hen-and-chicks pattern.

I made the quilt top 16 or 17 years ago...before "the big move".

She thinks I ought to finish this, too.

For the king-size bed in the guest room.

I told her these things take time.

And then she found these:

 

 

 

 

A nice fat stack of nine-patch blocks from a project I started a year ago.

It was abandoned mid-way because of a change in circumstances.

And by that, I mean Miss Helping Hands moved out of the dorm room with the green carpet.

Naomi thinks I ought to find new vision on this and get it done.

I told her, "Gosh! I just started this one last year. It needs to age."

So she moved on to these:

 

 

 

 

 

A big stack of hand-stitched stars made from the scraps of all the clothes she sewed for Miss Helping Hands when she was still a wee lass.

She really got on to me about this one.

She laid out a bunch of the stars, like this:

 

 

 

 

I told her this is not how it's supposed to look.

It's the Seven Sisters quilt pattern.

She just said, "It doesn't matter what the pattern is."

"You did all this work. You really need to finish this one!"

She says it would be a great gift for Miss Helping Hands someday when she gets her own home.

I just said, "Yes, it would."

"Some day when she gets her own home."

She sighed.

Then she found these:

 

 

A much smaller stack of hand-stitched pinwheel quilt blocks I started making out of Miss Mary Mack's clothing scraps.

"What?!"

"Why didn't you finish this one?!"

I told her I had realized I would never finish enough of those little, tiny, blocks to actually get a quilt done, so I had changed to these:

 

 

 

 

These are much bigger patches in the 'spinning spools' pattern.

At this point Naomi got very quiet.

And it made me feel kind of bad about myself.

She silently finished the closet-cleaning project and went to curl up and take a nap in this:

 

 

 

And just before she dozed off, I whispered:

"See. I do too finish stuff."

Which came first? The chicken or the earphones?

I've got myself a purty bad hankerin' for chicken.

I mean, chickens.

I want to raise some chickens of my very own.

I've been looking at plans for chicken tractors.

I've been looking at Araucana chickens and their beautiful eggs.

I've been talking to Prince Charming about the wonders of being chicken owners and hunting for Easter eggs every day of the year.

Prince Charming, however, has been talking to City Hall.

"It is against City ordinance to keep 'livestock' within City limits on property which is less than one acre in size."

It's also against City ordinance to jog with your earphones in.

Why, oh why, isn't he more careful about who he talks to?

It put me right out of fellowship when he told me that bit about the livestock.

And then I told my sad tale to my Chicken-Raising Seester (who does not live in the City).

Guess what she did?

She went to the feed store.

She heard, "Cheep, cheep, cheep."

She bought some Aracauna chicks.

And she told me they are mine, all mine.

I haven't gotten to meet them yet.

But she sent me pictures.

 

This one said, "Are you my mudder?"

  

 

And this one said, "Look how well their eye makeup is done!"

 

 

So I got to looking at that black eyeliner.

And their names came to me just like that.

 

Alice.

Amy.

Marilyn.

And Tammy Faye.

 

You know.

 

Cooper.

Winehouse.

Manson.

And Baker.

 

I can't wait to meet them.

 

I think I'll plug my earphones into my Ipod and jog over there.

"Parsley, dill, rosemary and thyme".

Yesterday I went to Horn Seed Co. and had a long talk about wildflowers and herbs with the nice folks there.

Omigoodness.

I love that place.

Today my to-do list includes moving a bunch of 12" pots to the sunroom, filling them with soil, and planting these:

 

 

 

I'm especially excited about the lavendar, because I want to make some lavender scented water to use when I'm ironing our hankies and linens.

I'm also anxious to get some new rosemary established, because some teensy critters attacked the big plant I've had in my outdoor herb bed for several years.

And then there's dill.

Ahhhhh.

When there is dill growing in the outdoor beds, I can smell it from just about any open window.

Ahhhh, I tell you.

 

My to-do list also includes mailing several cards.

(Progress report: I'm still keeping up with that family calendar, and enjoying it.)

(Very much.)

This little card is going out today to someone I love.

 

 

 

Here are some beautiful things that are not on a to-do list.

They're just beautiful.

These are feathers from my Chicken-Raising Seester's guinea hens.

God loves polka dots, too.

 

 

 

Isn't this something?

 

 

Here are some more beautiful things my seester brought me.

 

 

 

These are quail eggs.

She wants me to put them on my to-do list.

She wants me to blow them out so I can save them.

She told me how much it hurts the quail to "deliver" these eggs.

I think she even told me they scream while they're doing it.

Because the quail are so tiny.

 

 

 

But so are the eggs.

And I'll probably scream when I blow them out.

Next, please.

I'm not complaining.

About the ice.

Or the snow.

Or the cold.

Winter, after all, is a restful time.

I'm just saying that I'm ready.

I'm ready for baby birds.

 

 

Lots of baby birds.

 

 

 

And I'm ready for mama birds.

And bunny rabbits.

 

 

And tulips.

 

 

 

Real and otherwise.

 

I'm just sayin' is all.

You can't go back. But you can dream about it.

This is was me.

I was up for a short while this morning before I realized I wasn't going to be able to go forward on the amount of sleep the night had provided.

I went back to bed for an hour.

I had a dream.

I was driving my motorcycle.

The one I haven't owned since 1979.

I was driving along and suddenly, as far as my eye could see, the ground was covered with ice.

There were no other people.

There were no other cars.

It was a winter wonderland.

When I realized that I was driving on a sheet of ice, I closed my eyes.

And I thought to myself, "It is impossibly dangerous for me to be driving this motorcycle on this sheet of ice with my eyes closed."

I was scared for a split second.

And then I thought, "It's okay. This is only a dream."

So I sped up.

And I kept my eyes closed.

I felt the cold air on my face.

I felt the wind in my hair.

I drove across that ice.

And I felt incredibly free.

It was wonderful.

And then I woke up.

And I've been enjoying that dream all day.

Per your request, please find enclosed...

I'm grateful for every one of our Shoots, but today I'm giving extra thanks for Techie.

Because today he taught me how to scan things into the computer.

Isn't it amazing...

...that I'm just now learning that?

But wait!

There's more!

He also taught me how to create a PDF file.

And to put the link for it here on my blog.

I'm, like, so grown up now.

So, here you go.

Here is the pattern for Gwen's Dolly which some of you requested.

The original Black Apple Doll pattern, from which it was adapted, can be downloaded here.

The pattern is free, I just ask that you do not use it for commercial purposes.

And if you do make some girlies of your very own, please send photos so we can share the love.

If you have any questions when you're using the pattern, feel free to email me.

If you have any problems with downloading or printing the pattern...well...

...email Techie.

 

 

 

"O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?"

Happy Valentine's Day to you, friends.

I recieved two gifts from Prince Charming yesterday, and I took pictures of both of them.

It never occurred to me that they had any resemblance to each other until I came here to download the photos.

I was amazed to see this:

 

 

He ordered the roses in advance of the "big day" and brought them home to me last night.

I burned the pie crust I was baking for his Valentine's day dessert while I was taking them in.

 

He picked the tomato and brought it to me yesterday afternoon with my lunch.

It's the first fruit from the plant he's been nurturing in the sun room.

 

I love that guy.

 

And it's true, what Shakespeare said.

"That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell...

 

...like a tomato."

Breaking up is hard to do.

The sun came out today!

Lovely, lovely, loveliness.

I took the girls out to sit in the sun for a few minutes.

Some of them were not very ladylike, and they began climbing trees.

In their skirts!

I did get them all to sit still long enough to take their pictures.

Judy says hello.

Reiko says, "Konnichiha".

And Lucy...

 

...and Vera were both climbing, but stopped long enough to give us a smile.

 

 

Rosie behaved nicely.

 

 

She was playing with Ginnie.

Before we had to bid good-bye to the sun and the trees, I rounded them all up for a group photo.

 

 

 

 

Now, that all sounds real sweet, doesn't it?

But the real reason I took the photo is because...

Well...

I'm selling off the family.

And it hurts.

 

Shhh. Don't tell.

 

My Friday morning meeting was cancelled.

So I played around for a little while.

With this:

 

...and these...

 

 

...and this.

 

I thought I might make a little Valentine gift...

 

 

 
 

 

...for someone I love...

 

 

 

 

...who always carries a handkerchief...

 

 

 

...and my love with him.

Shhh.

It's a surprise.

I can't tell you who it's for.

But his name starts with 'P'.

And ends with 'Charming'.

Someone got hold of the scissors again.

Here's a little card that's going out in the mail today to someone I love.

She recently triumphed over something difficult in her life.

And it makes me smile when I think about it.

Just sitting here.

All by myself.

Smiling.

So I thought I'd let her know.

 

 

 

And that's how I feel about you, too.

Genealogy Day

I haven't snapped any photos today.

I haven't played with any embroidery thread or pretty papers.

I haven't dandled the baby on my knee, or counseled a college student.

There was a different order of business for me today.

It was genealogy day.

I've been at the salon.

Getting in touch with my roots.

 

 

My plate is full.

Maybe it's just because I'm not feeling well, but yesterday it was so much harder than usual to be a grown up.

At the end of the day I knew I had done the right things, and I was full of gratitude that I had been able to act responsibly.

But I was also very weepy.

And cold.

I was so cold.

So I spent the entire evening wrapped up in this:

My very own quilt.

Don't you love a nine-patch quilt?

There is something so homey and comforting and cheerful about it.

I made this one when I quit working 'out there'.

I thought I would be taking a nap in it whenever I felt like it.

I'm still laughing about that.

Oh, well.

Last night it was nice to sit on the sofa wrapped in this quilt, drinking tea, and talking to Prince Charming...both of us weeping over the goodness and faithfulness of God as we shared our day.

And, of course, there were needles and thread.

 

 

And polka-dot felt.

 

 

 

 

Having polka-dot felt makes it a little bit easier to be a grown-up.

 

 

Here's a big serving of pink love for you, my friends.

"May I leave my card with you?"

Many moons ago, the five artists in my little discipleship group challenged each other to have business cards printed as an acknowledgement, to ourselves mostly, that we really are artists.

I failed.

Yep.

Failed.

It wasn't that I was scared to put something in print, exactly.

It was that I didn't know exactly what to put in print.

And I couldn't seem to pick just one design or color to represent myself, either.

So I went on scribbling on pieces of napkins, old receipts, and church bulletins when the good people who saw and appreciated my work wanted contact information.

I'm tired of that now.

I have decided on a color.

And that color is green.

I'm going green.

At least for now.

And this is how.

I've got a lot of these.

And more coming every month.

Don't they annoy you when they're glued into your magazine and they keep it from laying open at the page you're reading?

They annoyed me.

Until I realized something.

They're cards.

They have lines for a name and address.

And they can be a lot of fun.

.

I don't think they'll be as easy to lose...

...or ignore...

...as other business cards.

 

I've got a nice little stash of them in my bag now.

I have met the challenge.

I have saved a tree.

I am woman.

Hear me roar.

Rita knows.

So sad.

No photo leftovers this Sunday.

I do have a photo of the sweetest little mouth, though.

And a sweet little dress accessory.

 

Are you catching on?

Have you figured out my favorite 'holiday' yet?

 

 

 

Rita knows.

But she's not telling.

A blessed Sabbath to you, friends.
  

Girl Power!

Miss Helping Hands was home from college overnight.

She's already gone back because she's on duty tonight.

She's R.A. to 40 girls in her dorm.

That stands for Resident Advisor in the real world.

But I don't live in the real world, now do I?

That's Naomi's world.

In Gwen's world we have more fun.

In Gwen's world we might say:

Ridiculously Annoying?

Radically Antisocial?

Really Attractive?

She actually is really attractive.

Judge for yourself.

 

We took this photo this afternoon.

Strange pose, you say?

Well, here's how we dealt with that.

We uploaded the photo to the computer and added some text in Paint Shop Pro.

We went here to chose a border and order some one-hour prints that looked like this:

 

Then we all went our separate ways for a couple of hours.

When we met up at home again, we added a little something to all those photos and then sliced them up!

 

Well, okay, maybe I am exaggerating.

We only made a couple of little slits.

Just big enough to accomodate this:

 

And now Miss Really-Attractive-and-Radically-Antisocial has a Valentine for her residents.

Forty of them, to be exact.

 

And all I have are memories.

Oh, yeah...and this sucker. 
 

"Ding, dong. The witch is dead."

Last night C.G. (Creative Genius) stopped by.

He's one of the Shoots.

He was messing around in the dolly factory.

Naomi asked him to be careful.

But there was a terrible accident.

 

And Lottie's new friend, Spazzie, met a terrible fate.

At first, Lottie was so upset that she could do nothing but weep while Mindy Lou tried to help.

Mindy Lou is a little bit jealous of Spazzie, but she loves Lottie and hates to see her so distressed.

As Mindy Lou struggles, Lottie finally realizes she must do something to help.

 

She gets to her feet and tries to lift the sofa that has fallen on Spazzie.

"Good, Lottie! Keep going!" Mindy cries.  

Lottie gives it her all.

But, alas.

Mindy Lou still cannot free Lottie's friend.

"I'm going for help!" Lottie screams.

 

Mindy Lou redoubles her efforts.

And then the unthinkable happens.

 

And Mindy Lou's true heart is revealed.

 

It was tragic, I tell you.
 

"I have a dream..."

Actually, I had a dream.

At exactly 2:08 a.m.

It startled me wide awake.

There was no action.

There was no dialogue.

There were no people.

There was just an incredibly colorful, extremely large, and completely life-like image; almost like a huge painting.

Of...

Are you ready for this?

My junk drawer.

I kid you not.

Kind of special, isn't it?

And I haven't been able to shake it.

So today I looked through my junk drawer to see if anything there could have sparked this extraordinary dream.

It's contents seem fairly humdrum at first glance.

I found these things in the push-pin container:

  

It doesn't seem to matter how many years have gone by since there were little Shoots of the male kind living here; I still find Legos at some point during every spring cleaning.

And speaking of springs, do we really need to hang on to this one?

Or how about the screw-top brass ball from the top of a lamp-shade which is long gone?

Still, I was a bit disappointed that a dream-inspired search would yield only these bits.

Then things started getting a little more interesting.

 

I found this "list" on the back of the Post-It pad.

Someone must've been making a run for the border.

Now, under this Post-It pad, and several other small writing tablets, I found an old two-part, carbon sales book which I used back in the 90's when I was selling custom diaper bags.

It was fun to look at the baby names.

"Aiyana Mae"

"Jonathon Luc"

"Katarina Louise"

But the REAL fun was finding this page:

 

 

And now you know how I got rich.

 

I wish I could see inside the junk drawers of America.

I'd like yours to be part of a Junk Drawer Gallery on my blog. No names will be posted. Only the contents will be real, their owners will remain anonymous to protect the innocent. Send your photo to: [email protected].

Meanwhile, leave a comment and tell me about the most ridiculous, intriguing, unnecessary, useless or fun thing in your junk drawer.

I've gotta run...I've got towels/clothes to wash and fold.

I never did like math.

Here we are for Gwen's first give-away.

I'm so excited that I get to send Twinsie Two to a loving home.

Just like I said I would do if 20 or more of you would tell me about a best-loved toy from your childhood.

There are exactly 20 of you.

Count 'em!

 

 

No?

Count again.

And count like you mean it.

I just don't think you're putting enough heart into it.

You remember...like you did with your stories.

It was wonderful to read about the dearly loved toys of your childhood(s).

Some of you made me want to weep.

All of you made me want to find your old toys and get them back to you.

What?

Enough already?

Tell us who won the blasted doll, you say?

Haven't you skippped to the end yet?

Well, I was just going to say that all these special stories deserve special treatment.

I couldn't have Prince Charming draw your names from just any old hat.

It had to be my grandfather's hat.

 

 

And now, without further jabbering...

Drumroll, please.

 

 

Emily!

I believe I have your "contact information".

I hope you will tell us all about Twinsie Two's new home

And Twinsie Two's new name.

Because, frankly, Twinsie Two sounds kinda dumb.
 
 
 

Old dog. New tricks.

Hey, kids!

I just reconfigured (I really like that word) some things so you no longer have to leave your email addy in order to comment on my blog.

You just click on "comments" under the post you're interested in, write your comment, and use whatever "screen name" you like.

We'll see how this works out.

Sorry for scaring some of you off.

I still have so much to learn.

But I am anxious to meet you.

And to find a home for Twinsie Two.

And if I keep writing on here I can put off my work out.